Last Friday during my day off I thought I'd surprise Julie a find the movie she's been wanting to watch (Love Happens). Problem was that it wasn't yet available to rent, so I thought I'd find it somewhere on the internet and just watch it online - I wasn't looking to download it, I just thought it might be in youtube or something. Turns out it was a terrible idea. I found it on some random site and so I set up the new projector (bought it used off ebay before Christmas), turned on the gas fireplace (which Julie and I put the finishing touches on just a couple days prior) and cuddled up to Julie on our big couch (yes I cuddle and yes our couch in the basement is big). 30 seconds into the movie pop-ups start jumping out of the screen and within 30 seconds my computer is on to a blue screen with the sentence "dumping memory" then silence and black screen.
Sometimes I just want the easy get deeper with God romance package. I want to sit down on my big couch with Jesus and stream into my life - a deeper devotional and prayer life. I quickly how found that life doesn't work this way, you have to create time to build a deeper relationship, it has to cost you something, you have to work at it. Sometimes I feel God saying "It cost Me something, why do you think it shouldn't cost you anything?
So, I'm working at it. It's easy to get lazy in our relationship with God, but it's so clear where this gets us. I was struck by Jeremiah 11:21 "the shepherds of my people have lost their senses. They no longer follow the Lord or ask what he wants of them. Therefore, they fail completley, and their flocks are scattered".
I'm given the blessing of being a modern day shepherd of God's flock and not only the flock but God has given me a family that watches how I live.
My Prayer - May I never loose my senses, Oh God forgive me if I do not ask what You want of me - May I not cause your people and my family to scatter from you, but the opposite. May You by your Holy Spirit teach me to know You, Help me to seek you with all my heart.
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