On Tuesday Julie was driving home from work when our vw golf stalled in the middle of an intersection. A kind soul pushed the car onto the shoulder, I came as soon as possible. When I arrived we pushed the car uphill into the SuperStore parking lot. From this point on my focused purpose was to restore things to "normal". I became impatiently fixated on remedying the promblem, it was all I could think about. I opened the hood, wiggled the wires and prayed. I gave Julie the nod, start er up! No go. So I prayed harder, admitting to God that I needed a miracle, and that this would be a great time for one. I prayed with expectation, why wouldn't God fix this promblem? I even incorporated some theolgy, alining my hope with Abraham's faith, which was a "hope against hope", a hope in a dead womb and his aged body. I had faith that God would bring this dead car to life. But to no avail. We left the car and walked home in the rain, I think the only thing I said was "I love you", as if that would fix the problem. Later that night I returned to the car, I opened the door, sat down, took a deep breath, prayed, put the key in the ignition, turned the key and awaited in expectation that sweet sound, but it didn't come. I was frustrated, God didn't fix my problem, the remedy was uncertian. The next day we got our car towed to midas. I rollerbladed to enterprise and we rented a car, then I went to my Romans class and we discussed Romans 5:3-5.
"but we also boast in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character, and character, hope."
Now I've heard this verse many times, it's kinda a little motto verse you break out when people seem like they need encouragement. But it's meaning is deeper, and it makes me feel crappy. I generally cannot boast in my suffering because when I suffer it usually produces impatience and discomfort. Here's how it's supposed to work. The greek word for character is dokime, which means proof or evidence of trial. The word originates from the process of refining silver, the silver is exposed to extreme heat, impurities are burnt off and what remains is pure. Working backwards on the equation. Paul was suggesting that perseverance or patient endurance in response to suffering is the evidence of a Christlike character. Suffering is supposed to work in us as a purifyer.
So what's my problem? Well I'm a suck. First of all the Holy Spirit always informs me of this, being as what I'm calling suffering is actually superfical disarrangment of my comfortable life. I am not suffering like the early Christians did, I am not suffering like the people in Darfur, I am not suffering like the homeless, and the hungry, and the children from broken homes. The truth is I am not suffering, I may be experiencing discomfort, but mostly I'm being selfish. And what's sick about me is, I don't even respond to discomfort the way Jesus want's me to. I attempt to remedy it quickly, I use it to gain empathy from others, and I reflect me, not Jesus. I have always viewed my grandparents as people with beautiful character. When I hear the stories of suffering which they experienced, I have no doubt that their reaction was patient endurance, because their character has been refined, and they emanate hope.
So the way of Jesus is to suffer or endure discomfort well. In suffering or discomfort we are to reflect patient endurance.
It is not to consume us, for then we put a veil on the glory God wants to shine through us. When we are veiled we cannot represent Christ to a hurting world, we cannot be the fragrance of life, we become the stench of death, we cannot be the royal preists, we are not being transformed. Not only this but we rob ourselves and others the opportunity to be tested, to be refined, to experience a new refined character. And so in light of this, I no longer pray a miracle for my car, I pray for a miracle in me. I pray that my character would be transformed to better reflect Jesus.
No comments:
Post a Comment